Eric Schmidt, the CEO of Google, is an Obama adviser and his next meeting with the boss is going to be as fun as that time I had to explain this site to my mom.
"For most of the past week, when someone typed "Michelle Obama" in the popular search engine Google, one of the first images that came up was a picture of the American first lady altered to resemble a monkey." - CNN
I´ve spent the better part of my adult life marveling at fate´s cruelty understanding and exploiting the way Google determines what search results appear at the top of their list. In short, the more respected sites that link to an image or page, the higher it appears in the search results. This Michelle Obama gaff isn´t an indicator of a flaw on Google´s well developed algorithm. Their math is wicked awesome. It simply reveals what content is well linked and trafficked. Draw your own conclusion on why this image would fit that category.
While you´re doing that, realize that even the morphed picture of Michelle is sexier than Google´s top images of Barbara Bush. Its important to tell you, I´d rather have sex with a belt sander.
As support in the polls wanes, it´s harder to get backing for controversial policies. Obama was imitating those that dissent with what the White House knows is best, by using an example of healthy vegetables that a parent has to force on their immature and naive children.
"I don´t wanna eat it. I don´t like it. It tastes bad. I don´t want it," said in...best nasal whine.
"We don´t want to hear the whining. We want you to eat it. Just eat it." - Obama USA Today
Oh, wait. My bad. You thought BARACK Obama said that?
Yeah, apparently that was a quote from First Lady and proponent of organically grown, farm fresh, massively overpriced arugula, making a joke about kids not eating vegetables at the healthy kids fair she held at the center of the universe White House. Obama(s) knows best. That first sentence in this posting is just a general observation, it has nothing to do with vegetables, or the quote in USA Today.
Some people think I´m kind of awesome when I manipulate the context of quotes and trick my ungrateful, never click on any ads loving fans. I´m becoming more like the mainstream media with every posting. And you love it.
The French Culture Minister wrote an autobiography that highlights his appetite for young male Asian prostitutes. I know it´s hard to believe. The man who defines French Culture is a gay, whore mongering, pedophile.
"The new French culture minister, Frédéric Mitterrand, is fighting to save his brief ministerial career after opposition politicians expressed disgust at his autobiography, in which he justified sex tourism and admitted "paying for boys".
The choice [of appointing Mitterrand] was reportedly influenced by the President [Sarkozy] wife, Carla Bruni, who has been trying to broaden the her husband´s cultural horizons." - Huffington Post
I´ve already established that I have a averaged sized, uncomfortably erect thing for Carla Bruni, but until now it was only because her body is like Kabul. It´s bombed out.
Now it´s because I know she tells her husband how to do his job. She has declared her open position on polygamy. Maybe if Obama took her as the second first lady, we´d have a presidential mouthpiece that talks as tough on Iran as fucking pansy ass France.
